My 3 Step Guide To Owners Finding Balance Between The Business & Family.
- Adam Felipe
- Sep 28, 2017
- 3 min read
I am a PROUD husband and father to one Superwoman and two amazing boys. I have a 3 year old who thinks deep down he is a "Ninja Turtle" and a 1 year old who wants to be part of the three year old's "Turtle Clan". To say that I love these boys is such an understatement. And the matriarch of the family is my wife. She is the Glue that holds it all together. They are my world and mean so much to me, but there are times while sitting in the office working long hours I wonder if I am giving enough back to them?!
The great news is that there is a balance and it's easily achievable. Everyone knows how hard it is to start a business but people never talk about how tiring it is to GROW that business from the seedling that you planted to a fruit bearing tree to provide for your family. If anyone can learn from my mistakes and how I fixed them I am glad to share some of what I have done.
There are only so many hours in the day. And that being said the biggest part of the balance is making the time you do have count. There are 3 Keys that I use to make my time count so neither the business or the family is left feeling like they don't have enough of my time.
1.) LISTEN. NO REALLY LISTEN! It might sound dumb to some people but listening is #1 for a reason. After a long day it's easy to go into autopilot and give generic answers and nod your head yes but your wife knows the difference, at least mine does. And your kids won't want to tell you stuff anymore if you are not engaging. I will gladly listen to my 3 year old tell me about how his Ninja Turtles can take down the bad guys or how he has a new ninja move that he wants to show me but when I'm actually "present" I'll engage with him and ask him to show me while he's telling me. But don't rest on your laurels here thinking you listened to your kids. Listen to your wife too, she has been with the kiddos all day which means she's had baby talk all day. My wife needs adult conversation and autopilot isn't going to cut it.
2.) GET ENGAGED. Sometimes we lose sight of how difficult or how much work it really is to be a stay-at-home parent. So when my wife wants something done, I make sure I there to help when I can. When the dishes are dirty from ten different meals the kids didn't like, I'm on it! When my wife wants some help rearranging the bedroom and I'm there, I'm on it. When my wife is exhausted from chasing screaming kids all day, I watch the kiddos for a few and make up for lost time, while she gets to have some alone time. When your wife is just exhausted and you can hear it when you call her. I got that too, a quick stop at the bakery on the way home to pick her up something nice so she knows she is appreciated. I have found that doing the little things goes a long way.
3.) GET OUT. BE ACTIVE. I don't expect to be able to bring my kids to Disney Every weekend but when I do have free time on the weekends you can bet I am using that time to make my wife and kids feel appreciated and doing something fun. Simple things like going to the beach, or building a birdhouse are always fun. Apple picking, going to the fair, taking the kids to the old Forts around here, going fishing on the boat, riding ATV's, going to local football games, surprising the wife with a salon day or just a plain old cookout and pool party in the back yard. The point here is that time is precious so when you actually have time with your family don't waste it by sitting in front of a tv or doing nothing. Make it count and build memories so they feel like you're actually spending time with them.
By no means am I perfect or Super Dad (not that I would mind if my kids felt that way) but I have learned from my mistakes. I see how hard my other half works to raise my kids and I see how much my kids miss me when I am gone or leave for work. That's why it's important that I do my best to make family time count when I have the chance. When it does count, it gives me the ability to focus on work and build my dream into the success I know it should be.
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